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Over 15 years, I have interviewed hundreds of entrepreneurs and their parents learn how they were raised.
In general, these families are very happy with how their children have turned out. Parents say that their adult children are not just realized and financially successfulbut generous and kind. But looking back now, many of the parents have told me that there are many things they wish they had known while their the children were growing up.
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These are not the same his regrets. However, the parents shared with me that, with this knowledge, they could have focused on different things or less stressed about what will become the bright future of their children.
Here are the four things they will come back and tell each other as young parents.
1. “Don’t panic if you don’t finish high school”
Most of the parents I spoke to believed that a college degree was essential for a successful career.
Entrepreneur Matt Mullenweg, the founder of WordPress, launched the company while he was a student at the University of Houston, and left to run it. Today, WordPress is just one part of Automattic, the global software company that Mullenweg heads.
Thomas Vu’s parents wanted him to be a doctor. Instead, Vu left UC San Diego to join the first intern class at Electronic Arts. He went on to become the lead producer of League of Legends, chief creative officer for Riot Games, and executive producer of the Emmy-nominated hit show “Arcane.”
In retrospect, they say they needn’t have worried so much. His children He didn’t have a degreebut in the end, it doesn’t matter. They pursued and achieved their dreams, and their skill, dedication and conviction were more than enough.
2. “His passion is not a distraction – it can have more impact than you think”
Acclaimed director Jon Chu’s parents told me that at the age of 10, he was hooked on storytelling and making movies. They worried that their passion could be a distraction from real work and responsibilities. But it’s hard to argue with international blockbuster success of Chu’s most recent film, “Wicked.”
Now, they understand that Chu put in those 10,000 hours doing what he loved, and it was good, it was worth it. Many of the parents I interviewed felt the same way. They recognize that their children’s passion has helped them succeed in their careers, even if their children’s lives don’t look like they imagined.
Many future entrepreneurs have played sports intensely and none of them have gone pro. Their parents told me they worried that all the time their kids were spending on the playground instead of the classroom was a waste of time.
Eric Ryan, the founder of Method, Olly, and Welly, told me he was a terrible student, but he loved sailing. It taught us valuable skills such as resiliencegrit, perseverance and confidence, all of which transformed him into the entrepreneur he is today. His parents don’t need to worry that all his hours on the water will hinder his career success – quite the opposite.
3. “Be more open about money”
Many of these entrepreneurs and leaders have credited their parents with teaching them the value of a dollar. So I was surprised that many of the parents said that they wanted to be more open about their family finances and had used it better as a teaching tool.
Some parents have told me that they wish they had brought their children into the financial decision, whether budgeting, buying big items like a car, or investing in the stock market. Others told me they wanted their kids to open a bank account or get a credit card in high school.
For example, they wish they had been more upfront when they bought a new car, discussing leasing versus buying, how expensive a car to buy, trade-offs with other things they want. I believe that teach their children about how to spend money It would have helped when they started their companies.
4. “Enthusiastically celebrate their failures and their successes”
Many parents of highly successful adults I spoke with said they were careful not to scold or punish their children when they failed. However, many also told me that they wished they had gone a step further.
Parents wish they had known celebrate failures as successful as they are, because they understand that you only take the kind of creative risks that lead to innovation if you understand that failure is how you learn and grow – and that your defeat should be fuel for your next success.
They saw that their children’s failures were more important to their development than their easy victories.
This is something I would say to myself as a young parent as well. Now, Billie Jean King’s mantra is one I return to often, and impart to my grown children: “It’s not failure, it’s feedback.“
Margot Machol Bisnow is a writer, mother and parenting expert. He spent 20 years in government, including as FTC Commissioner and Chief of Staff of the President’s Council of Economic Advisers, spending the last 10 years speaking to parenting groups about raising children fearless, creative, confident, resilient, entrepreneurial who are full of joy and purpose, and is the author of “Raising an Entrepreneur: How to Help Your Kids Achieve Their Dreams.” Follow her on Instagram @margotbisnow.
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