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as my day job a FT ColumnistI cast a suspicious, often disrespectful eye on the world around me. I tend to be someone who challenges everything — not because of it, but because I get suspicious when a whole group of people believe the same thing. I have often been characterized as a “contrarian”. I once hosted a podcast series called A Doubtful Guide to Crypto. I have the word “snark” in my X bio. You get the idea.
So you might be surprised to hear some of the things I work on in my spare time. I use the term “synchronicity” without any sense of irony. I promise Definitely mental Kinesiologist I am a member of a coven called the Sisters of Sanitary Cloth (both the descriptor and our name are slightly tongue-in-cheek, though more the latter than the former). I’m obsessed co-starAn app that claims to use NASA data to give you “super-accurate” AI-generated horoscopes. (This was recommended to me by a senior colleague. I won’t name names.) I write Morning Pages as advocated by Julia Cameron, author of The Creativity Bible. The path of the artist. I am, you know, “working”.
But how can this be the case with someone who is so wary of consensus views, and so passionate about the importance of truth and objectivity, what many of you may despise? I think it’s pretty simple: I have an open mind. And while I believe in the value of logic and empiricism, I would also argue that it actually is rational Science and medicine and to explore alternative approaches to life.
That’s how I find myself standing under a chandelier in a plush, Edwardian-style suite at the Savoy Hotel, using my fingertips to gently tap my “eyebrow point” as silent tears roll down my cheeks. “I feel like I’m on a never-ending hamster wheel of dates,” I repeat after my instructor as I tap out (we’ve already discussed how I feel; he’s not just guessing). “I’m bored” — I run my fingertips down to tap the sides of my eyes. “Eurgh” – under my eyes. “Bleurgh” – right under my nose. “So many dates” – under my lower lip. “So many dates!” — Collarbone. “But I’m ready to be open to love” – off the top of my head. “And I trust my intuition more and more every day” – back to my eyebrow point. etc.
My trainer is Poppy DelbridgeA former Warner Bros. executive who left the world of entertainment TV in 2018 to devote himself full-time to tap, a form of self-administered therapy that combines modern psychology and ancient Chinese medicine. I met him a few months ago, decided it was time to meet the love of my life. I went into a “taster session” feeling rather suspicious, spent most of our hour together in a state of deep cathartic crying (she had this effect on me in our one-on-one sessions), and left feeling like I was floating on air.
I tap every day now. I am a topaholic. As guided by Delbridge’s Rapid Tapping app as well as his book, Tap inI tapped on a park bench, in a sauna, on a Greek island, in a bath. I completed her “Pivot in Power” personal empowerment program (fellow graduates include Caroline Rush, Chief Executive of the British Fashion Council and The Royal Family (co-authored by Phil Mealey). I was on one of her “quick retreats” (our group of five included a Delevingne sister and a superfan who flew in from the Caribbean). And I’m now doing his “30-Day Love Cleanse,” which, like all of Delbridge’s programs, involves not only tapping, but also some pretty intense soul-searching and personal development work.
How to do the two minute tap
Poppy Delbridge’s Guide to “Rapid Tapping”
to start
sit down or stand comfortably.
set Your intention: Decide how you want to feel right now (calm, energized, focused).
check Your frequency level: Place both hands on your chest and notice your current feeling. Rate yourself from +10 (high happiness) to -10 (low energy or stress).
take a breath
remove Your hands: Slide them a few inches down from your collarbone and massage your “bruise” firmly into the balance and ground.
set Your objective:
1. “I feel…” Identify your current passion.
2. “Because…” Acknowledge why you feel this way.
3. “But it is possible for me to…”
Quick tapping sequence
by using With two fingers on each hand, tap these points while repeating your three-step answers.
1. In the eyebrows
2. Eye direction
3. Under the eyes
4. Under the nose
5. Chin
6. Collarbone and heart area
7. Overhead
finish With head hugs and shakes: Rub your hands together, place one hand on your forehead, the other on the back of your head, and hold for 10 seconds. Hold on and smile. Then shake your hands and body to recalibrate and refresh.
The 7-day quick reset is available in the free app as a video demonstration
Tapping is a so-called “somatic” therapy, meaning it focuses on the connection between mind and body. It has its roots in ancient Chinese medicine but was discovered by an American psychologist in the 1980s and then simplified to become the “Emotional Freedom Technique” by one of his students in the 90s. With EFT, you tap nine major “meridian points”—pressure points that are also used for acupuncture—to release trapped energy from stored traumatic experiences in the body. Although some have dismissed it as pseudoscience — Gary Baker, a clinical psychologist and lecturer at the University of Tasmania, calls tapping a “purple hat therapy” and told me “there’s no evidence that tapping on your imaginary meridians does anything for clinical. Psychological problems ” – There are studies that argue that tapping can be a way to treat depression, anxiety, PTSD, food cravings and even physical pain and Symptoms of autoimmune conditions.
And the more I tap, the more issues I find it helps me with — especially around stress, lack of motivation and self-doubt.
Delbridge’s version, “Rapid Tapping,” focuses on the seven meridian points that EFT uses and typically includes initial massage of the “wound spot”—the fleshy bit about an inch below the collarbone that feels tender to the touch—as well as a “head hug” at the end. (His app includes a how-to video). He likes to use tapping to “rewire our neural pathways” to let go of bad things in the past, similar to traditional EFT, and focus more on good things in the future. Put another way: to “manifest” the things that you want in your life.
If that sounds cheesy, rest assured that there’s nothing uniquely woo-woo brand of toxic positivity. Starting each session with expressing out loud how you really feel, and if it’s negative, repeating it until the feeling is less intense, I think is part of what makes the practice so helpful. When you say your negative feelings out loud, it doesn’t seem like you’re expressing excitement, but once you do, some of them start to feel a little ridiculous.
Most taps start by asking you to score how you feel — either in general or about something specific — and end by asking you to score again. Some days my emotions only edge; Other days my mood changes completely by the minute. Regardless, it seems something is working. I sigh when I’m tapping, a lot. Other people yawned. “I joke that I’m the only public speaker who doesn’t get upset when the whole audience is gasping,” says Nick Ortner, whose The Tapping Solution app has more than 100,000 subscribers.
“At the very least you’re resetting your nervous system into an antipathetic state — from fight or flight to rest and relaxation,” says Dr. Tara Swart, a neuroscientist and one of Delbridge’s clients, who taps most days now. “Those who are not used to being in a state of relaxed alertness may fall asleep.”
For my part, although I have yet to meet the love of my life, sigh, I feel like I’ve broken down a lot of barriers – or “love blocks” – since my first session with Delbridge back in May. I seem to spend much less time self-sabotaging, and am managing to control my emotions more successfully. I now use tapping as part of my morning routine, and sometimes at other times of the day, and find it similar to meditation in the way it grounds me, although it’s usually more uplifting, inspiring, and if you want it to be more focused.
I can assure you that I felt like a fool – a fool! — The first time I did it, but these days tapping around my face and chest with my fingertips feels strangely natural. Try it, I say. What’s the worst that could happen?
