Couples wed in a riot of colour as same-sex marriage becomes legal

After Thailand’s long-awaited equal marriage law comes into force on Thursday, police officer Pisit “Kew” Sirihirunchai hopes to be one of the first to marry his longtime partner Chanatip “Jane” Sirihirunchai.

And they were – they were the sixth family to register their partnership at one of Bangkok’s biggest shopping malls, in an event that city officials helped organize to celebrate the occasion.

Hundreds of couples in Thailand received their marriage licenses on Thursday, smiling or cringing at the moment they had long dreamed of.

It was a pageant of colors and costumes as local officials threw parties with photo booths and free cakes – one Bangkok district was offering plane tickets to the first couple who registered their marriage there.

“The rainbow flag is flying over Thailand,” Prime Minister Paetongtarn Shinawatra posted on Facebook from Davos, where he is attending the World Economic Forum.

Protesters said they hoped to pass the 1,448 mark for registration by the end of Thursday – 1448 is the section in the Thai Civil Code defining the definition of marriage.

“We’ve been ready for a long time,” Pisit said. “We just hoped that the law would catch us and help us.”

The two men have been together for seven years. Desperate to mend their relationship, they approached a Buddhist monk to give them a last name they could share – Sirihirunchai. They also asked the local authorities to provide a letter showing that they want to get married.

But they said the recognition of their agreement under Thai law is what they expected: “This is perfect for us. The law that protects our rights.”

Until now, official documents listed Pisit and Chanatip as brothers. That way they could be a family in the eyes of the law. Marriage certificate means LGBTQ+ couples now have the same rights as everyone else to marry and marry, manage their property, inherit and raise children.

They can also make decisions about health care if their partner is ill or unable to do well, or increase the amount of benefits – such as the Pisit state pension – for their partner.

“We want to build a future together – build a house, start a small business together, maybe a restaurant,” he adds, listing everything the law has helped. “We want to build our future together and take care of each other.”

Law, which it was passed by both houses of parliament in June last year before he was approved by the king of Thailand in September, it’s a big part of LGBTQ+ rights.

Thailand still has outside of Asia recognizing marriage equality – only Nepal and Taiwan have legalized same-sex marriage.

This is one reason why Aki Uryu, who is from Japan, moved to Bangkok to live with his friend. He said life is difficult for the LGBTQ+ community at home: “In Thailand, I can hold hands with my friend, walk together. No one says anything. It’s just different. It feels good.”

After the two women got married on Thursday, Aki said: “It’s like I’ve started a new life.”

Watching them celebrate, along with many other couples in Bangkok’s markets, was Zhang, a Chinese man who did not want to give his first name.

“We’re excited, we’re also very jealous,” he said. “Thailand is very close to China, but somehow it is very far away.”

And yet, even in Thailand, with its well-known LGBTQ+ tolerance, activists say it took a sustained campaign to get legal recognition.

“We have been waiting for this day for 18 years – the day when everyone can recognize us openly, when we don’t have to hide or hide anymore,” Rungtiwa Thangkanopast, 59, who will marry his partner of 18 years. May, told the BBC earlier this week.

She was at a wedding, arranged by her family, to a gay man, who later died. She had a daughter, through IVF, but after her husband died she started spending time, and later helping to run, one of the first gay bars in Bangkok. Then he met Phanlavee, who is now 45 years old and only goes by his first name.

On Valentine’s Day 2013 the two women went to the Bang Rak district office in central Bangkok to propose – a popular place to register marriages because the name means “Love Town” in Thai.

This was the time when LGBTQ+ couples began to challenge the legalization of marriage as a same-sex union by trying to obtain marriage licenses at county offices.

There were about 400 same-sex couples waiting with them that day. Rungtiwa and Phanlavee were rejected, and the Thai media mocked their efforts, using homophobic slurs.

However, the activists managed to persuade the government to consider changing the marriage laws. The concept of civil partnership was put before the parliament, giving permission to same-sex couples, but not equal rights with same-sex couples.

A military coup in 2014 that ousted the elected government left the group reeling. It would be another decade before the marriage treaty was ratified by parliament, in part because of the growing number of young, progressive political parties that supported the cause.

Their message resonated with the Thais – and attitudes had also changed. By this time, same-sex marriage was legal in many Western countries and same-sex love was deeply rooted in Thai culture.

This was an amendment in favor of the law which was passed last year with 400 votes and 10 votes against it. Even in the well-known senate, only four opposed the law.

And couples like Rungtiwa and Phanleeva now have their chance to show that they love each other, without the risk of public ridicule.

“With this law it brings legitimacy to our family,” says Rungtiwa, “we are not considered strange because our daughter is not raised by same-sex parents.”

The new law removes gender-specific terms such as husband, wife, husband and wife from the 70 sections of the Thai Civil Code on marriage, and replaces the gender-neutral terms such as individual and husband or wife.

However, there are many laws in Thai law that are not yet made gender-neutral, and there are barriers that same-sex couples use to have a family.

Parents are still defined under Thai law as mother and father. The law no longer allows people to use their preferences in legal documents; they are still stuck with gender. These are areas where activists say they still need to continue to push for change.

And it is especially important for the elderly, who have changed their minds.

“I really hope people get rid of the old stereotypes, that same-sex couples can’t have true love,” said Chakkrit “Ink” Vadhanavira.

She and her partner Prinn, both 40, have been together for 24 years.

“The two of us have proven our true love for each other for more than 20 years,” Chakkrit said. “We’ve been ready to take care of each other since our first day together. We’re no different from the same sex.”

Although Chakkrit’s parents quickly agreed to their alliance, it took Prinn’s parents seven years to do so.

The couple also wanted to share the business they did together, and other assets, as a family, so they asked Prinn’s parents to legally adopt Chakkrit, giving him the same name. Prinn says the new law has brought legal clarity to them.

“For example, right now a husband and wife who buy something together — a big thing — can’t share ownership,” Prinn said. “And when one of us dies, what we have earned together cannot be given to another. This is why equality in marriage is so important.”

Prinn said, these days all parents treat them like they treat any other child in the family.

And when they had problems in their relationship like any other family, their parents helped them.

“My father started reading gay magazines to understand me better. It was very interesting to see that.

Additional reporting by Lulu Luo, Paweena Ninbut and Ryn Jirenuwat in Bangkok